Our Christmas tree miracle

Friday my daughter was home sick from school for the day. She started feeling better and was looking for something to do. She in touch with me at work and asked if she could put up our Christmas tree. Of course I said yes. She did a beautiful job. There was only a couple of problems. First the box was filled with magots!!! Somehow they got into the plastic bin and just infested it. She freaked out but then got out the vacuum and meticulously cleaned the box and the tree. I came home and looked at the tree and surprisingly enough it seemed magot free. However, I was a bit skeptical and decided we shouldn’t decorate it until Saturday.

Saturday morning rolls around and I inspect the tree. It seemed to be clean. I decided I would give it a little shake just in case and see if any surprises fall out. Nothing falls but there is a snapping sound. I didn’t think to much of it until I noticed the tree was not sitting firmly on all the supports in the base. I turned to say something to my daughter when the tree falls over against the wall. I pulled the tree upright and it falls over again. We finally looked at the base. I cracked part of the base in half and broke off some of the supports. This tree is probably 12 years old or older. It serviced us and the previous owner well. But like most of you this is one tough Christmas financially. What was I going to do?

My son and I left the house to hit the garage sales and look for deals for Christmas or items for me to sell online. I thought I had better keep my eye out for a tree. My son said to me, ” Mom we don’t need a tree this year. It’s ok really. Plus Christmas is not about presents. It’s really about the gift of Jesus.” Both my children have been making it clear what this holiday is about and showing some concern over what the holiday has become. I could not help but tear up because as a Mom I want to shower blessings on my children this time of year. I was also proud of the kind of young man my son is turning into.

After pulling myself together I looked at my son and said, “let’s just see how God works this out”. I was driving at the time and we turned a corner to see the back side of a sign. At first I thought it was for the sale we were just at but at the last second decided to turn the corner. As I did an older gentleman just put a large box on the front curb of his home. My window was down and he over heard me say to Noah, “is that a tree?” He looked up and must have seen the surprise on my face. I asked him if it were a tree. He smiled and said, “yes, do you want it?”  It took everything I had to not cry right there. I told him I broke my tree this morning and I have no way of buying a new one. I was hoping to find one at a garage sale. He said, “you can just have this one.” He then called up to his wife to bring the stand and they proceeded to load the tree in my car. This whole time I’m still a little surprised. I told the lady they were part of a miracle. We had just put it in God’s hands. I pulled away with tears of thankfulness to my God for providing. This season is not about the tree it is about the birth of Christ, however, that tree was important to God at that moment.  His way of taking care of this single Mom and her children.

Afterwards I said to my son, “we need to trust him like that more often.” We couldn’t help but laugh and list some of the things we have no control over that we needed to give to God. Let me share you another little secret. Every Wednesday my car is full of teens that I take to church on Wednesday night. That would be my son, my daughter and her two friends. Those girls are stuffed in the back seat like sardines. I have no room to take any of my son’s friends. I simply stated to a dear friend one night that I need a bigger car. I said that in jest but at this rate I really do. I do not have the means for another car and no plans in the near or long future either. He said to me simply, “if you need one God will provide.” God will determine that need. It’s in his hands but the lesson I learned that night is the one I applied to the tree. My hands were tied. I could do nothing. God would have to work this out. He did.

You know that tree was not a perfect one. The pole was a bit hard to figure out because the rings you place the branches in were upside down on half of it. It’s a color coded tree and none of the labels were correct. We even had spare parts. The tree is up and decorated. It’s really very pretty. This reminded me of each of us. We can be a little backwards, not coded right and even may have some spare parts but in the end we are beautiful just the way God made us.

God used a Christmas tree that was going to be thrown away, rejected, not wanted any more to bless me and my children. He can do the same with us. We may feel unwanted, rejected and not cared for but we may be just the blessing that someone is in need of today. So keep your eye open for those every day miracles and don’t forget that God may use you to be that very miracle.

It’s not my fault

Healing really is a process. We take one small step at a time. Recently I took another step in my heart changing journey. Our journey is often filled with beautiful pathways filled with meadows, wild flowers and waterfalls. Each journey though also consists of mountain top experiences, valleys and cliff hanging trails.

Have you ever been hurt by another? Maybe your spouse was unfaithful, or you were abused as a child. Many have been victims of crimes like rape, stalking, burglary, muggings and identity theft.

I know in my life the hurt of others had a very long lasting affect on me. These individuals chose to hurt me. We are giving free choice and free will and we all make wrong choices. No matter the reason for their choices I was hurt in the end. I felt deep and profound pain. By the grace of God I had made huge strides in my healing journey. Healing often is another form of growth which lasts a lifetime. We are never really done and won’t be until we are face to face with Christ in Heaven.

Guilt and shame were my boulders and stumbling blocks in this journey. I took the blame for their actions. Yes, I realize I am the girl who is always talking about setting healthy boundaries. I had the head knowledge of this but for some reason it not sink into my heart. One day I was reading the book “Wild at Heart” by John Eldridge. He spoke of a scene from Good Will Hunting Staring Matt Damon and Robin Williams. Matt’s character was dealing with abandonment issues relating to his father when Robin tells him it’s not his fault. He kept repeating this until it sunk in and Matt’s character was weeping with the realization.

If only you could understand what went on in my head. Nothing really soaked in until I started sharing it and I heard myself say it out loud.

I write this very transparently so that maybe you too will understand. Yes, we need to own our own actions and our decisions but when a wrong or hurt is done to us, well, we have no right to own it. It’s not your fault.

 

Isaiah 58:8
Then your light will break forth like the dawn, and your healing will quickly appear; then your righteousness will go before you, and the glory of the LORD will be your rear guard.